and the story continues and yet...still no good news

so apparently my last post was filled with a little too much hope :( after getting a more elaborate explanation of tomorrows procedure plan 1 isnt even a plan! they are going in tomorrow, sometime, to remove every piece of hip replacement they put in on Feb 11. damn it, damn it, damn it!!!!!
now, i am not in the medical profession so i dont completely understand what they are exactly doing...so i hope you can follow me...they are removing all the hardware they used to do the hip replacement, there is apparently still some cancerous cells that were missed so they are cutting off more of his pelvis. they are going to clean everything up to hopefullly get all the bacteria out. his femur bone will be placed up in the hip area and his muscles will be tightly stitched together in order to hold it in place. he will have to use a cane to walk...he will have movement over his ankle...his right leg will be 3 inches shorter than his left and he will have to lifts put on every shoe.
even typing this out doesnt make anything make more sense...i am still so confused and so mad that we are here! what makes me the maddest is that all of his setbacks have been at the hands of the hospital staff. surgery #2 on Feb 19- correct dislocated hip due to pt pulling it out and now surgery #3 due to an infection at the hads of the nursing staff...and you ask why is it their fault? how could you put blame on someone for an infection? easy...he does not have a staff infection which is good news...he has an infection that comes from fecal matter. now why in the world is this even possible? i know i am probably sharing way too much but...due to the surgeries and all the meds they have been filling him up on laxatives...guess what people...the shit will eventually come out!!!!! after asking for assistance because he knew what he needed to do...the assistance offered wasnt much. needless to say, it was a mess and this happened more than once!
i know from personal experience that all medical staff will tell you, aww...the incision looks great! youre doing good! well guys...looking at something from the outside doesnt mean shit! the infection is always within. they sent dad over to the rehab facility with him under then notion that everything looked great, when underneath it was all unraveling. we had hopes of packing the incision in order to heal it. then we thought they might reinsert a drain. it didnt even cross our minds, well...atleast mine, that they would end up taking it all out.
i knew the option of the removal of his leg was always a possibility i just hoped that wouldnt have to happen. at this point...anything is possible and i hate that!!!!
i cant imagine what is going thru his mind...i cant imagine what is going thru my own mind. i know he will wake up tomorrow...he will be here...i just cant help but be scared for him. i know that he is physically going thru all of this and i cant imagine the emotionally hell he is in right now. i just want my dad...plain and simple...i just want my dad